Monday, August 5, 2013

Annnnnd a month later...

How cool would it be that the reason I haven't posted in the month of July is because I was frantically writing and typing to reach my goal of 15,000 words for the month for Camp NaNoWirMo?  It'd be TOTALLY COOL!

And sadly, not what happened at all.

I didn't rage-quit like the last time I tried something like this.  This time, I did nothing.  I got up to 6,437 and just kinda stopped.  I woke up every day with the thought, "I am SO going to write the crap out of this scene."  And then it's suddenly 10:00 PM and there was nothing done.  Let me share with you some of the reasons/excuses why, because that's what I do:

  • Started my new full-time job and I suck at creating a new routine.
  • Adam and I had a kick-ass BBQ for the 4th of July that really took 3 days to prepare, host, and clean up after. (Adam read this over my shoulder and wanted to point out that I did not par-take in much of this at all; I entertained our friends and guests and went to work at my old job for the last time hung over the next day.  Moving on....)
  • Played a bit too much WoW (World of Warcraft)... and even then nothing WoW related, the Battle Pet/Pokemon crap in there now.
  • Spent time laying on the couch eating string cheese and catching up on the DVR with Restaurant: Impossible.
  • Whined about not being used to working 8 hours a day, 5 days a week so therefore I had no energy.
  • Paced around the house trying to find something to do other than write.
  • Spent a lot, LOT of time on Kongregate trying to earn badges.
  • For a week, studied the "scripts" I needed to be comfortable with for my new job.
  • Cried and whined to Adam and my Mom about how I want to write and like writing, but I have no motivation, and when I do, I still don't write.
  • Made the decision to leave roller derby while I begin writing, which through that I found that a few people who I thought were my friends actually were far from it (that's a whole 'nother mess I'm not even going to explain further).
So that's all been going on in my head.  All those same excuses/reasons can also be applied as to why I haven't posted here.

But here's what I know now.

I CAN write on a daily basis.  Give it a minimum of an hour.  Any sort of writing.  Working more on the story I had for the Camp, blogging, journaling (kind of, I have this Speed Dial to the Universe book, more on that another day), I'll even count reading all the writer-themed blogs I've been adding to my Feedly like it was my job.

My other hump/bump/mess I'm letting hold me back is the whole wanting-a-writing-group-or-mentor-or-people-to-have-coffee-with.  It's not exactly panning out the way I thought it would.  To be blunt, it's not panning out at all.  I'm having a difficult time trying to "rev up" the folks who I thought would be interested, and it's just not happening.  I'm sure part of it has to do with my own "attitude" in writing, so I kinda brought it on myself if you look at it one way.  And/or, I just haven't opened myself up to the right people yet.

The next task of mine is begin to find an online writing community to participate in.  Yes, keeping up on this blog and staying up on the blog-verse I personally as counting (it's just a bit more challenging to "get into it" since I can't even friggin' post).

And now an hour and a half later, I finish this post.  I blame Adam for calling out my laziness regarding the BBQ.

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